Feb 12, 2014

Love found

You see the concept of love was vague those days. Love in my simple mind then was all receiving. What would I get when I found love, was what I cared for.

First I would find love. Sure. Then would follow a huge teddy bear. An enormous card with the biggest paper heart. Dozens and dozens of red roses. Loads and loads of love letters.

Lots and lots of tears. Why? Because I would be dying and he would be crying. I would survive. Later he would be dying and I would be crying. He would survive. (see what effect some movies can have on us?) We would then live happily ever after.

Of course, with more teddy bears, roses and tons of other tokens of love to follow...

Sure found love at last! Then happened life! Child rearing, career building, house keeping and up keeping rolled in one after another and all over again! Love as I had imagined was nowhere to be found.

Teddy bears did come - when I had least expected them, when the children were born. They sat squarely in the middle of the living room for a while, later moved to the bed room, then to the kids rooms, but now lie forever forgotten in some closet corner.

Roses too arrived, but it took many years and some tears. When they came spontaneously though didn't know what to do with them. Just plop them in a vase and go about the days business. No time to ponder over, freeze them or preserve them. At least click a picture? Okay, click! Now move on! After a week or so toss them out and continue to move on... It fails to spark new excitement, you see. It mocks the shed tears and makes the younger me look silly for wanting them in the first place.

Loads and loads of love letters - now that is one thing that did happen and continues to happen (though in miniature post-it notes form), but with a twist - they are mostly from me!

About dying though we had discussed it once; when we were contemplating a Will. I offered my side of the family would care for the children if something ever happened to the both of us. He countered his side of the family would indeed. At that point we decided, we would both live - no matter what! So we live. we love. happily till now. hopefully for years to come.

The concept of love is somewhat clearer these days. Love in my simple mind now is not at all about what I receive; but what I give. Respect, love, forgiveness, a good meal, an encouragement, a good night's kiss, less nagging, more appreciation - simple things of course; but this is it! This is love! All giving! generous. selfless. expecting nothing in return. never. ever.

Love has been found. Not as imagined, better!

I am sure yours too. So why not, happy Valentines Day! Isn't it for everyday?!


KParthasarathi said...

You have rightly concluded love is not in receiving things but in giving love, not in kind, but in feelings.Material things are just outward symbols of love but what real love is merging of the two hearts.A nice topical post nicely written

NRIGirl said...

Glad to hear from you KP. Hope all is well at your end.

Here we have plenty of snow, slush, rain and occasional sun shine. But since Winter calls for it, we learn to live with it.

'Spring will be here anytime now', is my way of seeing things.

Take care KP. Stay in touch.

~ Hephzi

Renu said...

very much..love is all that and much more..

Felicity Grace Terry said...

Apologies that its been a while since my last visit, I've been suffering terribly with vertigo.

Such a lovely post. Not that I'm adverse to love tokens at any time of the year but I like them most when they are least expected.

R. Ramesh said...

hi boss thanksss for your kind message..sorry i could not be in touch for long as i was tied up and u know the reason..now will be regular here..stay connected:)

Bikram said...

helooooooooo :) how are you doing ..

remember me ..

I am the last person to say something on Love.. it seems nothing works for me .. so i will just keep SHUT.. :)


Haddock said...

You have said it right..... is not at all about what I receive; but what I give.

Camila Rafaela Felippi said...

Is really more important to give and not wait to receive. It's not just with a boyfriend, but with all our life: with our parents, friends and people you don't know, because you never know what will happen tomorrow!

Rajeswari said...

Love surely is more about giving and less on receiving. ...I guess this filmi kind of magic happens to.most teenagers and they get trapped....:) nicely narrated....well done :)


baili said...

love is a sense of breath,its hard to ignore.love you dear .really miss you.see u soon God bless

Shilpa said...

I loved the post as well as your blog name
do vist my blog

baili said...

wow loved your each word friend ,love is strange feeling without having it inside you one cannot experience a successful existence and yes it is all about giving and spreading joy and peace around you it is the reason which gives meaning to one.s life keep up lovely writing

Unknown said...

As i when I was mid way reading,I did get nostalgic and wondered how would that be if I was by your side taking care of you and cherishing each moment that we spend till the last breath 💙

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